Tag Archive: love


A Devil With(out) a Soul..!!

And we fell in Love..we had the perfect marriage that anyone would dream of..the best designer dresses, favourite music band, red roses and a lot of happy faces all around..we were too excited to wonder how quickly everything had happened..we had met just a few days back and here we were taking the BIG step! We said “I do” like two people who had been waiting since ages to be by each other’s side had been given a lifetime chance to be together..through thick and thin..! I always called him “Devil” for the little mischiefs and pranks he played on me..and each time I did that, he would add “with a soul” with a smirk on his cute face. Now while putting the ring on my finger and tying me to himself for lifetime, he said “with a soul, and now a soulmate too!” and made me blush..!

We were both happy until that day..when the mask he had been wearing all throughout was out in the open and he showed his true colours..!!


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Everyone left the room..there was silence and darkness all around..both in the room as well as in my life..I wondered what I had done to deserve this..was saying the truth out loud that punishing rewarding..??

And then there was a creak of the door..a little light followed in..disturbing the darkness..the darkness of the room..the darkness of my life!! I waited to see who had cared enough to turn against the world and walk in when everyone chose to walk out..and I saw his shadow..it didn’t take me long to realize that it was him..! Of’course it was HIM..! who else could it be..!!

I have had a similar sequence in my dream,
but all this would have happened only after I was dead..
Here in reality, I was alive..!
My soul would fly up to heaven and glowing light would enlighten my soul..
In my dreams, it was an angel..
but here in reality, it was the Demon!

He came near me..held me up and said..”You nasty little creature!I How did you even think that you could make my family and friends go against me..Happy now? Now that you know that they believe me and not you..! hah! now stay here till you get back to your senses and realize what a mess you have got yourself into!! Either find a way to clean it up or rot here till the last drop of your blood dries!” His words broke not only the deafening silence of the room but also broke all my hopes of living surviving breathing..!

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And he left..I heard the lock on the door moving..the final confirmation that I was captivated..at a place that I once thought to be my own house! The flood of my tears that had been held up for so long, came rushing out..as if the gates of a dam had been opened up! I could no more breathe as if someone had squeezed my lungs or cut the oxygen supply in the room! For once I expected someone..anyone, from the entire crowd standing right outside that door, to believe me..trust me with my words..give me a chance to explain what exactly had happened and not the twisted version that they knew..!

But alas! I felt like the world had ended and I was the only one dying surviving..!!

and now I knew..he really was a DEVIL!
With Without a soul..
and definitely without a soulmate..!!

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Image Source : Google Images

Random Ramblings..!

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No one can ever take away something from you that you want to have..and by want I mean something like air for your lungs..because without it, it will be difficult to breathe..impossible to live!! You just have to keep trying and never ever stop..no matter what!! 😀 😀
~Be Strong!

I don’t exactly know what being in love feels like..admitting being in love with someone is a big big thing to do..but if it means that that person is always on your mind, you find reasons to talk to him/her, you feel like sharing the slightest events of your day, you can talk to him/her for unstoppable hours and in the end you realize it was all nonsensical, you crave to spend time with them, you have silly fights which just brings you closer..you thought about that one person while reading all these lines..then probably its love baby..!! 🙂 🙂
~Love life!

If people don’t care about you..or stop caring about you all of a sudden..then I guess its time to move on..even if you could have never imagined of the current situation ever happening in your life, its time to move on! Always have a little ego, not a bad one but a healthy one..which does not allow anyone to mess with your self esteem..and if someone persistently does that, its time to move on!! Do not be scared to give up on people..because sometimes its best to leave them in their own world and time for you to start a life without them! Value those who value you..!! 🙂 🙂
~Be strong!

Sometimes you don’t learn things the easy way..life makes sure you learn it the harsh/hard way..but when it does, be strong..because tough times come and go..but tough people stay..! Times change, seasons change and you eventually learn to adapt yourself into the new one every single day! Its time to enjoy what you have..not to brood over what you don’t or can’t..!! 🙂 🙂
~ Love life!

Hello everyone..its been weeks, months, ages since I posted here..yeah have been kinda busy but that’s no excuse..anyways, this one comes as a duet from me and a very special friend SS..It begins with a famous quote by Lang Leav..its more of the the thought continued..Happy Reading! 🙂

“It was a question I had worn on my lips for days – like a loose thread on my favourite sweater I couldn’t resist pulling – despite knowing it could all unravel around me.

“Do you love me?” I ask.
In your hesitation I found my answer.”

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and then in that moment, I felt like turning back the last few seconds of my life..
I wish those words never left my mouth..
I wish I hadn’t really asked that question..!
The question that changed ME..!!
I guess living in the myth was much better than living with reality slapped on my face!!

But what was done, was done!

I knew I had to live with it..because I could not imagine a life without her!!
though I could not make her love me, I could not let her go!
she was an important a part of me..like oxygen for my lungs..
her one smile made my entire day..
and I could stay far but could not just break off !!

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I wondered, what was the feeling inside her when I had been loving her all thoughout!
What did she feel about :
the happiness that we felt inside us whenever we were together?
Those endless chats whole night with no sleep in the eyes?
those unsaid things that we understood .. just by looking into each other’s eyes?
Was all this not Love for her??
Well may be not..but for me it was like staying with an angel in heaven..
There is nothing more I could ask from my life!!

And we decided to continue being friends.. little aloof but not away..!

I could still see her everyday..we still exchanged greetings..
for me, being around her was far more meaningful than giving a name to our relationship! 

All I ever wanted was to be around her..to take care of her..
and to be there.. whether needed or not..!!

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and then one day..she came to me..with a little serious look on her face..
I wondered if she had been in trouble..
We sat down and she said “We cannot be friends anymore..!!”
and my entire world crashed down..I almost had tears in my eyes..!

but she stopped them and then jumping, beaming with happiness,
she fell in my arms and uttered those words I had been dying to hear
 “Stupid! We cannot be friends anymore because I have fallen in Love with you!”

and she sat down on her knees, and in the most gentlemanly manner she said :
“Will you marry me?”

And I yelled out a YYYEESSSSSSSS!! 🙂

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And I am happy that I kept clinging to that vague hope..
the hope that kept me going since that dreadful day..

probably the only hope that was left in me..
because Love, as they say, NEVER EVER dies!!

(Image Source : Google Images)

I was there for you every time I felt I was needed..

Anything you’d ask me to do..I undoubtedly would..

coz beneath everything I did, there laid the feelings..

that you never understood..! 😦

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I heard your whispers, I smiled your smiles..

I felt your feelings, I cried your tears…

I happily took your ignorance in so many situations

And yet tried my best to take away all your fears..

 

You meant the entire world to me..

Your feelings started driving my mood..

There wasn’t a moment I didn’t think about you..

And beneath all that laid feelings, that you never understood.. 

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I don’t know how and when you crept into my life..

I don’t know why you looked so familiar to me..

All I know is that whatever, wherever I am today,

Is all I could ever be..!

 

One look at your face and I would forget to blink..!!

All I knew was, to be true you were just too good..

In every conversation we had, my heart would sink!

and beyond all my madness n support lay the feelings,

that you never ever understood..!! 

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And now you are there all around..

in every hour of my day..

in every thought of my mind..

in every feeling that I feel..

in every beat of my soul..

and deep down, I wish you felt the same..!!

 

I still hope that one day you’l wake up and miss me.. 🙂

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P.S – Yes I am BACK..after almost around 3 months..yeah that’s a long long time..!! Guess I had been off..just lost somewhere and somehow so aptly back to where I should have been all this while..a heartfelt thanks to a friend who prompted me to write this post..thanks! for you brought me back to MY WORLD..where I fit the best..! 🙂 🙂

To Uncle Santa..!

Merry Christmas to everyone who’s reading this!

Holiday season has begun and everyone around is getting excited for Christmas..decorating the house, the Christmas  tree, baking cakes, preparing candies, buying presents..the entire feel of Christmas is exciting in itself..the roads shimmering with twinkling little light bulbs, people dressed as Santa handing over candies to little ones, Christmas carols, snowflakes. 🙂 🙂

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Somehow I get really excited for Christmas..(yeah the picture above is mine 😛 ) though its not hugely celebrated in my country and more specifically in my city but the holiday mood, sound of Christmas music and jingles, visiting a Church, walking past the streets that are all lit up making you feel like its a walk in heaven, writing Letter to Uncle Santa  – all this enough to give it a Christmas feel 🙂 🙂

I know this comes a little early but its a conscious effort..considering the size of my wish list..I thought Uncle Santa might just need a few extra days 😛 😀

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I would like to end this happy note with the song that has been stuck in my mind this season..


I feel it in my fingers, I feel it in my toes.
Christmas is all around me, and so the feeling grows..
It´s written on the wind, it´s everywhere I go..
So if you really love Christmas, come on and let it snow..
(Yeah I happened to watch Love actually recently)

 

Merry Christmas
Ho Ho Ho!! 🙂 🙂

Tied Till The Last Breath..!

A duet with dearest  Shruti

There was a time
When we never left each other’s side..
Yet time forced us apart
Were we still tied with our heart..??

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Several things happen during the day..
That remind me of you..
I couldn’t think of not being with you even for a moment..

And here I am living miles away from you..
Are we still tied with our heart, I wonder?

Just when I thought we had lost our charm
Just when I felt we had lost that spark..
Just then something inside of me stirred
And the heart silently spoke words of love..

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Words that had been silent for long..
Words that I no longer knew that they existed..
Suddenly those feelings took over again..
And I was lost..in the memory of happier days..

I slowly felt the old ache again
I crave to be close again
I do not even realize
Tears silently wet my eyes

3

I pick up my phone but put it down again..
Thinking it has been too long..
Too long since we shared our lives ..
Too long since tears never left my eyes!

Should I leave my ego aside?
Will calling hurt my pride?
Or will this call fix everything again?
Or will my effort give me pain?

With all the courage I convince my heart..
To call you once and make a start..
I dial your number and my heart skips its beats..

Three big rings and no one picks the call
I curse myself and on my bed I fall
Finally on the fifth ring, I hear a sound
The world stands still and my head spins round..!

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You ask me who I am..
and in that one moment my world spins around..
My voice gets stuck in throat..
like I was lost in darkness since ages
and was suddenly found..!

I lose all hope
I hear a voice
Is it my heart that cried?
Am I alive or have I died?

But suddenly you utter my name..confirming if its me..
The entire world seems to brighten..
My name never sounded that beautiful albeit in your husky voice!
I pinched hard to check if it was a dream

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Was I lost in my own fantasy
Or was reality finally better than my dreams??
My heart raced..it almost danced in joy..
You almost scolded me for getting vanished and not being in touch..
And we were back to square one..

Those same silly fights..that same laughter..
With you, i realized, life was so much easier..
Why I didn’t call before?
Why did I let silly ego burn my mind

True love always shines bright
Like stars that glorify the night
I now wanted to forget the moments spent without you..
I completely wanted to forget that part..
For life seemed to be so much more beautiful now..

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Yes, we were still tied in heart..
Nothing can take away the love
Nothing is as precious as love
Two felt the single beat
Yes, we were destined to meet 🙂

Destined to be loved..
To be together in life and death..
I promise to love you and be by your side..
Till my last breath! 🙂

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Quotes – Lang Leav

About Lang Leav :
Lang Leav is a poet and internationally exhibiting artist. Her work expresses the intricacies of love and loss. The enchanting work of contemporary Sydney author and artist Lang Leav swings between the whimsical and woeful, expressing a complexity beneath its child-like facade. 

The journey from love to heartbreak to finding love again is personal yet universal. Lang Leav’s evocative poetry speaks to the soul of anyone who is on this journey. Leav has an unnerving ability to see inside the hearts and minds of her readers. Her talent for translating complex emotions with astonishing simplicity has won her a cult following of devoted fans from all over the world. In 2013, she launched her latest book Love & Misadventure.

Below are the 10 most beautiful quotes I have ever come across..A must read for the person who likes this genre!

1. “THREE QUESTIONS”

“What was it like to love him? Asked Gratitude.
It was like being exhumed, I answered, and brought to life in a flash of brilliance.

What was it like to be loved in return? Asked Joy.
It was like being seen after a perpetual darkness, I replied. To be heard after a lifetime of silence.

What was it like to lose him? Asked Sorrow. There was a long pause before I responded:

It was like hearing every goodbye ever said to me—said all at once.” 

2.  “ALL OR NOTHING”

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3. “YOU AND I”

“Like time suspended,

a wound unmended–
you and I. 

We had no ending,
no said goodbye; 

For all my life,
I’ll wonder why.” 

4.  “SOUNDTRACKS”

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5. “SOULS”

When two souls fall in love, there is nothing else but the
yearning to be close to the other. The presence that is felt
through a hand held, a voice heard, or a smile seen.

Souls do not have calendars or clocks, nor do they understand
the notion of time or distance. They only know it feels right to
be with one another.

This is the reason why you miss someone so much when they
are not there— even if they are only in the very next room.
Your soul only feels their absence— it doesn’t realize the
separation is temporary.” 

6. “HER WORDS”

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7. “HE AND I”

When words run dry.

He does not try,
nor do I.

We are on par.

He just is,
I just am,
and we just are.

8. “JUST FRIENDS”

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9. “A QUESTION” (My personal Favorite)

“It was a question I had worn on my lips for days – like a loose thread on my favourite sweater I couldn’t resist pulling – despite knowing it could all unravel around me. 

“Do you love me?” I ask.

In your hesitation I found my answer.” 

10. “US”

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P.S : Visit her personal blog or facebook page to know/read more..It will be worth every minute you spend 🙂

..and he left..not a single word..I kept questioning but he had nothing to say..no excuses..no explanations..just nothing..he did not even make a vague attempt to try to make it work..I kept wondering what made him despise me..betray me? For him it was all so simple..just a “we cannot be friends anymore..its all over now” and that’s it..?! Was it all I had been looking forward to all this while? Just the other day I was planning my life ahead..being by his side for the rest of my life and today..I felt I was having a nightmare and somebody would pinch me back to reality..it all came like tsunami..in just a few moments, it took away everything I had..my entire world had turned upside down..I literally didn’t know how to react to the situation..the fact that we were no more together was yet to sink into my mind and more so, into my heart..my heart, my stomach, the entire body felt empty and hollow..heartbreaks are not always like a bomb explosion, they can even be like a feather falling silently..nobody else, except me, heard or felt the pain..I tried my best to gather the broken pieces and look intact but inside I knew I was shattered, too badly to look like what I had been before the fall..

 ***

H-E-A-R-T-B-R-E-A-K

 ***

I tried my best to gather the broken pieces and look intact but inside I knew I was shattered, too badly to look like what I had been before the fall..nobody else, except me, heard or felt the pain..heartbreaks are not always like a bomb explosion, they can even be like a feather falling silently..my heart, my stomach, the entire body felt empty and hollow..the fact that we were no more together was yet to sink into my mind and more so, into my heart..I literally didn’t know how to react to the situation..my entire world had turned upside down..in just a few moments, it took away everything I had..it all came like tsunami..I felt I was having a nightmare and somebody would pinch me back to reality..just the other day I was planning my life ahead..being by his side for the rest of my life and today..was it all I had been looking forward to all this while? just a “we cannot be friends anymore..its all over now” and that’s it..?! For him it was all so simple..I kept wondering what made him despise me..betray me? he did not even make a vague attempt to try to make it work..just nothing..no explanations..no excuses..I kept questioning but he had nothing to say..not a single word..and he left..

 

P.S : Another attempt at a story (an excerpt) with a little different style..not sure if  anyone has ever thought/written about it..The uniqueness is that the last paragraph is exactly a copy of the first paragraph albeit read backwards..and still completes the feelings..!
Click on the link to read the earlier one : What goes around..comes around!!

Does it makes sense to you?? 

Your views/comments are welcomed.. :)

The Fighter (Part II)

Here’s the continuation of dedication to the selfless army men dedicating their lives towards their countrymen..staying awake all night so that we can sleep peacefully! The link to Part I is : The Fighter (Part I)

 

I went down to the national defense academy..

filled in to be a part of the infantry..!

We were taught all about the enemy..

and trained in ways, to make them go to the cemetery..! 

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Though the beginning turned out to be sore..

But I was always looking for more..!

I tried my best not to give up anytime..

because at this stage backing out would be a crime..!

 

 I met people of all kind there..

people from different strata’s of society and diff regions of our country..

together we stayed and everything we shared..

lived a life totally exemplary..!

 

So I went ahead..with all the severe training..

Weather no more mattered to me..be it sunny or raining..!

With the blessings of my parents and loads of dedication..

I now felt ready to serve the nation..!

3 After the training, I was posted all over India..

a mixture of modern exhilaration and colonial aesthesia..!

my beautiful country has a breath taking sway..

for its enemy’s blood, I bay..!

 

Everyday we met some warriors, who had kept their lives at stake..

We were guided from their experiences, so that same mistakes, we don’t make..!

Everyday we lived, we dreamt to fight..

My family’s memories still haunted me in the night..!!

 

My wait for service was not too long,

I was posted on the warfront..!

The enemy had started the war song..

And I was ready with my weapons..all sharp and blunt..!!

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We were commanded to engage the enemy first,

me and my battalion were full of zeal..!

with so much energy I thought my abdomen would burst,

it still felt so nice, as it was the real deal..!!

  

The battle lines were drawn, they fired the first shot..

I wanted to kill all who wanted to treat out motherland like a harlot..!

I took down at-least a dozen, but then I felt something like pain…

but the battleground was totally frozen, so I went on looking at the gain..!!

 

I took down a couple more, everything around me looked hazy..

Now I could not move anymore I fell down feeling a bit dizzy..!

now here I am feeling the sun, I know I didn’t have much time to spare..

surrounded by men with whom I shared my life..and now there wasn’t much left to share..!!

 

but even in death I am not at peace..

for my mother’s sake my heart aches..!

me and my father had the same confluence of fates..

we both ditched my mother, for our birthplace..!!

1 And that is the life of a soldier, a life full of virtue..without any vice..

Always ready to face the fear..always ready to sacrifice..!!

 

P.S : Thanks DG for supporting me so beautifully in writing on such an amazing topic..looking forward to write more soon 🙂 🙂

 

What goes around..comes around!!

An attempt at a story (an excerpt) with a little different style..not sure if  anyone has ever thought/written about it..The uniqueness is that the last paragraph is exactly a copy of the first paragraph albeit read backwards..and still completes the feelings..!

 
                                                                     ***
 
..it made my heart ache..the very thought that you didn’t even care to ask how I was..after all that I have been through..it created a deep hole in my heart..no matter how much I tried to ignore it..no matter how many times I uttered “Huh? Even I give a damn!”, each one came out with a sigh of melancholy and hope..may be you just might ask..may be you have been busy..my heart kept waiting..my eyes were stuck on the phone..still there was nothing from you..I kept waiting for you cause the candle of hope still shimmered through the darkness of my life..I knew that things were not the same as they used to be..somewhere deep down I knew that times had changed and I no more had the right to expect anything from you..sadly, our heart takes a lot of time to accept what the mind already knows..even after everything that had happened between us, those memories never seemed to leave my mind, haunted me every moment..sometimes expecting someone to do something turns out to be as painful as expecting him not to do it at all.. reality and realizations struck me late and in a pretty hard way..my mind had become a twisted place crammed with several thoughts, both dark and sparkling..I just wasn’t sure which thoughts were to be nurtured..
 
                                                                      ***
 
 
I guess I was just very confused with what I wanted..it was a stage where I was too messed up to be sorted out..!!
 
                                                                      ***
 
I just wasn’t sure which thoughts were to be nurtured..my mind had become a twisted place crammed with several thoughts, both dark and sparkling.. reality and realizations struck me late and in a pretty hard way..sometimes expecting someone to do something turns out to be as painful as expecting him not to do it at all..even after everything that had happened between us, those memories never seemed to leave my mind, haunted me every moment..sadly, our heart takes a lot of time to accept what the mind already knows..somewhere deep down I knew that times had changed and I no more had the right to expect anything from you..I knew that things were not the same as they used to be..I still kept waiting for you cause the candle of hope still shimmered through the darkness of my life..still there was nothing from you..my eyes were stuck on the phone..my heart kept waiting..may be you have been busy..may be you just might ask..no matter how many times I uttered “Huh? Even I give a damn!” each one came out with a sigh of melancholy and hope..no matter how much I tried to ignore it..it created a deep hole in my heart..after all that I have been through..the very thought that you didn’t even care to ask how I was..it made heart ache..
 
Does it makes sense to you?? 
Your views/comments are welcomed.. 🙂